All about pee
How much can you really write about pee? Honestly, I never considered it until this weekend, when I realized it came up in three completely different circumstances this week. And so, maybe because my frazzled mind can’t come up with anything else or maybe because the universe is telling me something special about pee … here goes.
- Erotic – While reading through requests for custom videos, I encountered one I had to ponder for a while. It wasn’t golden showers, I didn’t have to pee on anyone or get peed on – I had to pee myself. The fantasy involved the model peeing in her pyjamas and underwear, and then taking a shower to wash off. I mean, there’s nothing too difficult about that I figured. Except I’ve never deliberately peed in my underwear. I accepted the request anyways, assuming that with enough water I’d be able to pee anywhere. Or on anyone if necessary. I haven’t heard back at all from the requester so my foray into erotic peeing may have to wait.
- Personal – I peed the bed a couple of days ago. I’ve told numerous people because hey – it’s always better to be the bearer of your own bad news. Or funny news. (I learned this from a professor in a professional context, but I’ve applied it more for embarrassing personal moments.) I was having a dream about peeing and woke up to realize I should’ve woken up earlier. It was only a dribble, barely a spot on the sheets. But enough. Enough to smell. So I had a laugh, stripped the bed and did an emergency load of laundry. Maybe I’ll start carrying panty liners around again, just in case. I’m not ready for Depends … yet.
- Hygiene – I had a long conversation with a girlfriend about cleaning bathrooms. I find it amazing just how far pee can travel away from the toilet when a man pees. Seriously, it can spray a long distance. I’ve discovered over the years of living with men that being drunk or tired can affect accuracy. I’m not complaining because hey, I’ve cleaned up enough period blood over the years to know not to bitch about toilet cleanliness issues. And nothing, absolutely nothing, can ever be as disgusting as cleaning the men’s urinal at one of the first bars where I worked. Even saying “urinal puck” makes me want to puke.
And hopefully, that’s my last word on pee 🙂
